Why I Won’t Tell You It’s the “Happiest Day of Your Life”: The WIC Part 3
Category: From the Cat Perch | Published on: November 11, 2015
If you're shopping for wedding vendors, there's a 138% chance that at least one has told you that your wedding will be the happiest day of your life. Or worse: that it will only be the happiest day of your life if you hire them. It's a threat veiled in a promise that business in the Wedding Industrial Complex love to throw at unsuspecting couples. When a vendor can't sell you on value or talent, they'll try to knock you off balance.
I'm here to tell you: your wedding will not be the happiest day of your life. (Probably. I hope so, actually.)
There's a lot of happy things in the world.
Births. Adoptions. Getting your dream job. Winning the lottery. Finding $20 on the street. There's lots out there to be happy about. Sure, you want to be happy about your wedding, but that doesn't mean you can't be happier.
Your wedding will not be the happiest day of your life. (Probably. I hope so, actually.)
People have terrible long-term memory. If you ask someone off the street what the happiest day of their life was, they'll probably answer with the most recent really happy day they had. Because that's what happens over time—our memories get fuzzy and faded. Memories from months, years, or decades ago get harder to recall.
If your wedding when you were 25 is still the happiest day of your life when you're 96, then that must have been a rough 71 years. (Either that or you have short term memory loss like in the movie 50 First Dates.)
In some ways, it's as much as blessing as a curse, because:
Things will go wrong.
My wedding was three years ago. I barely remember most of it. I do remember that I got almost no sleep the night before. We were late showing up to the venue, so we were late taking group photos—late enough that guests were showing up and watching us being photographed! We didn't practice the timing of our entrances and it didn't line up with the music (though it did garner a laugh!). I spent so much time talking to guests that I never got a plate of food, and our plan to have plates in tupperware to take to the hotel didn't work out. They got left at the venue. Oops. Even better: We forgot to confirm our B&B reservation, and when we showed up at 10pm, no one was there! We had to scramble last minute to a hotel. Worst of all? As we were heading out in the morning to catch our cruise, I realized I didn't know where my passport was.* I had a major panic attack and almost couldn't go! We got lucky at the terminal and they let us board with my ID.
Say it again with me: "Things will go wrong." And it's okay.
I loved my wedding. I got to see my friends and my family. It was a beautiful day in a beautiful state park and I have lots of beautiful pictures to remember the best parts.
Your wedding won't be perfect, either, even if you plan for years. You can't control everything, and trying to is just going to stress you out more.
Make your wedding happy and your marriage "the happiest."
For your wedding, have fun. Be happy. Do epic things you'll still remember at 96. While you're planning your wedding, don't forget to build a marriage that makes every day "the happiest day of your life."
*I found the passport while unpacking from the honeymoon. It was hiding in my suitcase. The entire time...
Be nice. If you're not, we'll remove your comment and ban you from the conversation.
Please check out our Welcome Policy.